Sunday, July 22, 2007

Hayden and Me

Hayden and I went to the mall on Saturday while Melissa went to Madison for Scott and Laura's second shower. She took Donovan with her. We flipped a coin to see which baby would stay with me. Hayden lost. We then flipped the coin to determine whether "Heads": Hayden stays in the front yard, alone; or "Tails": Hayden gets watched by Kyle. Since Heads or Tails might result in the same outcome, we figured we would leave Hayden's demise to a coin toss. Much to Hayden's dismay, the coin landed on Tails. So Melissa left with Donovan.

Thinking of nothing better to do, Hayden and I headed out to Southridge Mall for some entertainment. We took the red jogging stroller, two bottles in a warm thermos, and some nooks. We entered through Sears, and proceeded into the Mall where we got harassed by some cell phone sales people. At this time, Hayden was sleeping. Yet a cell phone salesperson had the nerve to say, "Sir, Who is your cell phone provider?" I responded, "Hey, can't you see he is sleeping, and he won't answer you since he is sleeping!" The sales clerk was perplexed. We kept walking.

Our first major stop was to Gloria Jeans, because I needed some caffeine. The rest of the mall trip locations are classified, because we were shopping for their mom's birthday present.

While we were JC Penney, Boston Store and other stores such as The Gap and American Eagle, several nice ladies, young and old, stopped me to acknowledge that I was a man with a baby. Several asked inquisitive questions, implying things such as "where is his mother, she must be somewhere nearby?"; "Where is she shopping while you have the baby for a short period of time?"; and "Are you only pushing him because he was fussy, and his mom had enough?" I just told them she wasn't around. They asked where she was at, implying that maybe child services should be called. I said , I don't know where she is at. After they asked why I didn't know, I replied that his mother gave up and left about a month ago, and I have been taking care of him since . . . solo. They proceeded to give me a hug. I then asked if they would buy us lunch. They said no. I asked, well what about some clothes, since there is this really nice Polo button down shirt that I want. They then walked away. I hoped this experience would teach these kind souls to jump into the 21st century and acknowledge that guys can bring babies to the mall (with proper food and diapers) without mom around, and that the baby stands an 84% chance of being alright. I will try bringing both of them to the mall later this week, since I never found Melissa a gift.

After we left the Mall, Hayden and I went to Pick N Save and then to Blockbuster. Hayden stayed in his car seat for these trips and I just carried him around the store. All in all, we were out and about for about four and a half hours, and we did just fine. We then watched a movie, made lunch, and then we watched Victoria Beckham and the LA Galaxy get destroyed by Chelsea.

New Torture Device

Melissa has been utilizing a sling with the boys. They both passed out from the pain.

When Donovan refused to help me mow the lawn, I threatened to put him in the sling. This was him before the threat:

and after:

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Everyone is still alive

and happy!

Hayden and Donovan are becoming more and more alert everyday. Donovan enjoys laying on the floor mat with stuff hanging in front of him, such as Hailey's beard. Hayden enjoys swinging in the swing and watching the mobile and the tv. They also are starting to smile more often when you talk to them.

We started Stranger Danger training with the boys by watching the Hitcher tonight. I think they got the message about aiding people walking down the road looking for a ride.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Tum, Ta-Tum Tum-Tum

The Boys went to the doctor today! Hayden weighed 9 Lbs 8 ozs. Donovan weighed 9 lbs 2 ozs. They were both about 22 inches long and in the bottom 5% for their weight to age range. The doctor gave Donovan a prescription for reflux, since he probably has the heartburn and acid reflux of a 53 year old long haul trucker. Both boys were also diagnosed with holycrapamIcuteonin all over their heads, and they each are battling a case of gonnabeacutekid syndrome as well, also known as GBCK Syndrome or That Kid From The Jerry Maguire Movie Disease. That can last for a few years. All in all, Melissa said they did fine going to the doctor.

Donovan was really cute tonight. I held him for about an hour, and he was wide awake. He kept smiling and just wanted attention and entertainment. We watched Victoria Beckham's show with Melissa. Donovan liked that. Hayden was busy eating and then went to sleep in the swing in the family room. About 8:00 p.m., Donovan started crying and he was upset until about now. I just set him in the swing in the bedroom and he seems happy, so hopefully his tummy settled down. Melissa will give him the reflux medicine shortly before we go to bed. Hayden is downstairs I think. He might be outside with Hailey. I should go check.

Sunday, July 15, 2007


That is how Melissa and I both feel. Plus, I just got barfed on by Donovan. . . twice. The boys have been a bit fussy the last 48 hours and will only sleep, if they so choose, when being held. We slept sporadically last night for only a few hours in total since we were holding, jiggling, and dancing around the camper with them. The boys head to the doctor tomorrow so we will see how big they are and whether they will get diagnosed with fussitosis or whether they just have crabbyonceinawhileitis.

The boys did attend Aunt Laura and Future-Uncle Scott's wedding shower on Saturday. They had fun and enjoyed seeing all of Laura's Aunts and Great Grandma Lucy. They will see them again soon at Laura's wedding.

Thursday, July 12, 2007


Donovan and I are up. Donovan is enjoying having me hold him upright on my shoulder so that he can burp sporadically instead of focusing on sleeping. Frankly, I think he loves the taste of the Mylikon Drops and would like some more. So, Donovan and I decided to analyze the Mylikon "Frequently Asked Questions" portion of their website to see if they even think this stuff actually works:

Mylikon provided no such affirmation, nor did they even present a question which might provide even a hint of an answer to our quandry. But who would have thought that any person using their product would actually have the nerve to "frequently" ask whether it works.

Now Donovan is smiling, so it doesn't matter until the next "up" time.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Party like a Rockstar, Party like a Rockstar

Future Uncle Scott's Bachelor Party was Saturday in Eau Claire. The boys, who are the ultimate bachelors with a wonderful bachelor pad at home, were invited but chose to stay back with their mom and Grandma Sue. The Bachelor party was fun. We volunteered at the local Salvation Army most of the night. Then we helped some illiterate children learn to read. It was very rewarding. Unfortunately, a window to Scott's house was broken somewhere in the mix.

I have a discussed a recent episode with Hayden, where Hayden allegedly made Craig feel a little more damp than usual in his t-shirt. While Hayden denies responsibility, he desires to clear his name and has offered Craig the opportunity to hold him again to see if a wet mark reappears on Craig's shirt.

I walked around with both boys in a sling tonight. It was interesting but Donovan was not to happy about it (he was on the bottom, whereas he was used to being on top when they were in the womb). Melissa then gave them both a bath and ruined their evening.

The boys will be at the Sherwood Lodge on Saturday this weekend. Come and visit. Laura's shower is also there, but I would reccommend coming to see the boys. IN addition to gifts for Laura and scott, the boys will be accepting larger gifts as well.

Monday, July 9, 2007

My Mom's Birthday Present!

We got my mom a cat for her birthday. My Mom named him Moe since he kind of looks like a mole. I thought that Kevorkian would have been a better name. The cat came from the back wing of the local Humane Society. Therefore, it only cost half the price of any other animal at the humane society. Plus, they through in the neutering for free since they felt it would be reprehensible for him to reproduce. This was definitely the best gift we could have given my mom!

Carson thought he was really cute too and is begging Karolyn and Jason to let her get one!

Thanks yous

Melissa and I have been quite lax in getting responses out to everyone who sent the boys gifts for the shower and following their birth. As you can guess, time has not been our ally. We are very appreciative of everything all of you have given or done for us, and we do intend to get some notes to each of you. In the interim, below are some photos from the shower from April 22 which was about two and a half weeks before the babies were born.

Random Pictures that make me happy

More Birthday Pics!

The three Trophy Grandbabies: Donovan, Sonja, and Hayden!

Grandpa Tom wincing in pain after Donovan stepped on his . . .

Sunday, July 8, 2007

Pics from Mom's Birthday Party

Pictures of the pets from Mom's Birthday at Karolyn's House

Mr. Slim hanging with his bonies!

Kountess Kailey and Kount Konan the Barkbarian


Mr. Hayden's Bath Time Hell!

Donovan before and during Bath Time Hell

Pictures from July 4

They took a bath, its nothing exciting. Sorry.

Donovan smiling while watching Hayden suffer in his bath

Hayden trying to figure out why we are wiping water and soap all over him

I did a search for "gulyababies.blogspot" and Google asked me if I meant to search for "uglybabies.blogspot" Thanks Google.

Our good buddy Craig came to visit this weekend, and it was nice to hang out with him. Craig slept in the camper with his headphones on most of the night. Sorry Craig. We also had a nice dinner on Friday night with our friends Thadd, Kim, Emma, and whiskers.

The boys enjoyed the heat on Saturday. They spent most of the day inside the camper in the AC. We finished watching Die Another Day, Glengary Glen Ross, and we suffered through half of Happy Feet before shutting off that piece of trash. The boys enjoyed Alec Baldwin's motivational speech and are now familiar with the art of closing a sale. Unfortunately, they have not closed any sales, and therefore, they do not get any coffee.

To our friend Jenn, congrats on the giant step up at the University of Iowa!

Thursday, July 5, 2007

Swinging in the Rain!

The boys like the swing . . . when they are tired enough for it. Since it has rained a bit, they have spent time inside swinging. I want to make it very clear, the fact they like the swing does not make them swingers.

They had an uneventful Fourth of July. After doing some yard work, we all went into Rapids for lunch, and then I went to Menards to buy some fun stuff. Melissa, the boys and Grandma Sue went to the Wisconsin Rapids Mal. I purposely mispelled Mall because the Rapids Mal is not deserving of the extra L.

The boys went to Pizza Hut today with their mom, grandma Sue and grandpa Dan. I was busy earning the boys some money by working in Madison.

Right now, it is the boys' witching hours. Yes, they have more than one hour. They even have more than two. That is right--they have four! From about 8:00 p.m. to 12:00 a.m. every night, they are a real joy to be around. On the positive side, they do sleep between 2 - 3 hours at a time, but they do take longer to get back to sleep, so it is about 1.5 hours from the time they both get back to sleep after the first one wakes. screaming baby, got to go

Tuesday, July 3, 2007

Pre Fourth of July Festivities

Donovan and Hayden celebrated the day before the Fourth of July by staying up intermittently until about 5:00 a.m. this morning. They slept soundly from 5:00 a.m. until 7:30 a.m. and then again until 10:30 a.m. While it was mostly Hayden staying awake, Donovan did little to help his big brother sleep. We had a talk with both of them about other ways they can engage in pre-holiday celebrations such as (1) sleeping; (2) laying awake quietly; (3) smiling; (4) doing the dishes; (5) making us dinner; and (6) setting up and operating a realistically profitable home-based business.

It is supposed to rain most of the Fourth of July. As my dad would say, "Typical in Wisconsin." For my parents, whenever the Wisconsin summer holidays roll around, it is always some weather-related downer that makes the holiday a little bit tougher to celebrate such as sleet and tornadoes on Memorial Day, forest fires and tsunamis on July 4, and the proverbial Noreaster on Labor Day. Hopefully Mom, Dad. Katey and the pets are able to stay busy inside! I just went over to the library and rented (for free) three movies for me and the boys to watch--Glengary Glen Ross, Die Another Day, and The Good Shepherd. If they are to succeed in sales careers or as U.S. or British spies when they get older, then they need to watch these movies and learn.

The boys went to SuperWalmart, a camper dealership, the laundromat, the QuickieMart, and numerous other stops today with Melissa and Grandma Sue. I stayed behind and got some work done and made certain Hailey stayed out of trouble. If anyone knows how to de-Gremlinize a miniature schnauzer, then please let us know. We tried refeeding her after midnight, but that only made things worse:

The boys turn eight weeks old tomorrow. We do not have any plans to celebrate. However, they are accepting well wishes, so if you have well wishes, then post them. Additionally, we would like to thank all of the donors from the last fundraising drive. The money goes straight to the Boys' "Walt Disney World Vacation For Mommy and Daddy While the Boys Stay With Either Grandma And Grandpa Who Wants to Take Them For A Week Fund."